weekend

I have a lot to get out

I went home last weekend and spent time with my family. I really was not looking forward to this at all-generally weekends like this are really stressful for me; pressure from my dad, between my parents...Weekends like these are the reason that I moved away in the first place-the family stress and judgementalness and all of that-I can't deal with...

So that is what I thought this weekend would be. It was not that at all.

On Saturday, I went over to my dad's house and saw one of my sisters, my stepbrothers, dad, and stepmom. C, one of my stepbrothers, put together this whole thing for me regarding what cars I should get, taking into account what I can afford to make in lease payments, gas mileage, etc....it was really sweet of him-I know nothing about cars, so that really helped me. Dad, L, and I went to a dealership to look at cars...I settled on one, and then while my credit was being checked for leasing, we went to lunch and picked up my grandfather on the way. C came back with us to get my car, and then my dad took us to get mani/pedis...my dad is super metro..its kind of funny, but not having to pay for mani/pedis is always nice.

The next day, mom and I tried to take my bubie out to lunch...she said she wasn't feeling well enough. We did spend an hour at the house with her, but it's just not the same..the dimentia has completely changed her. She used to do anything I would ask of her..in the most healthy grandparent way, she was obsessed with me...now she won't come out to lunch or dinner with me, but she loves when i'm at the house..I also found out that things that used to make her happy, like going to synagogue, she has also lost motivation for....My sister's bat mitzvah is in a month..mom wants her to be in pictures and go to the services, but we don't think she will convince herself that she should come out...it's so sad to see how much she's changed and what the disease has done to her. I don't even want to know what's coming next..I'm just glad she knew who i was this time.