stupid lions falling in love

ugh love..something i don't believe in and i don't deserve...

having a really hard time with this matt thing...not that i really i guess can be upset about it..but i am...and then him stopping a make out...and me realizing about the other girl...i felt like a fat piece of gross, disgusting, unattractive, undesirable piece of shit...no, we weren't officially dating, but it still hurts...and it hurts a lot...

just once i want to have something that someone thinks is special, and i want someone to care...i want to mean something to someone