Peace of Life

I wish I had the balls to say this to your face..but since i do understand that you're going through a really tough time and are really depressed and unhappy...i won't-i hope the best for you, i really do..but

you've been a really shitty friend lately...more than lately...for a few months...i know you're unhappy with your job and school..i know you use your passions to shield you and distract you and help you forget when you don't have to be thinking about it...i get it, i really do, but look-you're an adult now..you say you want to move out, make something of yourself..do something for yourself..but you're working completely against that...life isn't about instant gratification, it's about working hard and putting your all into things that mean something to you...but not just THOSE things; the things that help you lead into and get to those things...you're severely mistaken about the career path you're dreaming of..yeah it is about who you know--everything is, but you can't get anywhere without knowledge in your field...and it's also not a party...aspects of it, yes, but you would still have tons of responsibility, and you wouldn't be able to fuck around like you think this job allows...I hope you do get to do what you want to do, but i hope you understand what it really entails and love it in spite of all of that.

but look-it frustrates me so much that you invest all of your time and energy into things that ultimately are pushing you back. it's okay to like a band and go see their shows and enjoy their music and crush on a guy or 2 in there..but when you sit online, talking about them, posting about them, following their every move...traveling to concerts, upsetting yourself because you feel like your'e meant to be with one of the members but he doesn't see it..that isn't healthy, and it's only pushing you back...you say you're unhappy at home, you have no friends, you have no life..but why is that? it's because you're spending all of your time online or texting and not putting yourself out there and hoping for things that yes, may happen, but might not-you have to put yourself out there..and not just going to concerts and talking to the guys in the band and getting their numbers-they aren't your real friends..yes, yet, but they really aren't..they're around once every few months, you can't hang out with them, call them for ice cream or coffee or just to hang...believe in yourself, go somewhere, meet people...show your interests besides these bands..music is a GREAT interest, but when you seem SO wrapped up in it, people may think that that's all there is to you..and i know there's so much more.

you're priorities are warped..i know you see it right-you're talking to bands, trying to make connections, but you HAVE TO GET THAT DEGREE-in this day and age, getting somewhere without a degree is near impossible-it sucks, but it's true...you hate your job-remember how much leeway they give you so you can do the things you want to do..if you hate it that much, find a new one and don't complain about it unless you're doing something to fix it or change it...stress is really tough on everyone, but sometimes you have to face it and make things easier for yourself...do your assignments..just DO them...you won't be able to pass your classes if you don't...if you don't, you're stuck with a job you hate, living with your parents..you need to understand responsibility...sometimes you have to watch your money..skip a concert...not have take out for every meal...obsessing over bands isn't going to make you money...it's not going to make you genuinely happy..you have to do something for yourself that makes you happy..and once you really accomplish that, you'll feel it

i personaly don't want to talk about bands all the time..i have other things to worry about..i worry about you so much that it seriously makes me sick..me and your other friend..we know you are more than this...and we know your potential..and we are so worried about the direction you're taking now...granted it is not as bad as drugs or alcohol dependency, but it's equally not as healthy...responsibility means actually cleaning your room..doing your assignments..saving money..doing the things that show yourself and others that you are ready to be an adult...just knowing that you can do it doesn't mean anything..DOING it means something..not just once, not just twice...but consistently

you seirously have no idea how many people are pulling for you and caring about you right now, or how many people are worried..you've got to see that you CAN do this..and..yes, there is nothing wrong with forgetting your trouble for a while, but living like you have none and trying to pretend they don't exist..will get you no where but in more stress and more trouble...unfortunately, life is not like that...i really hope that you come to realize this soon..i'm worried about you...i miss my friend and i hate that you're so depressed, but you've gotta take and realize that there are things that you can do to fix it..it's not all attributed to outside influences

i love you...i want you to have everythig you deserve and everything you can reach to in this world..please let yourself do that