Peace of Life

do you ever feel like breaking down, do you ever feel out of place?

why yes simple plan, speak to me, because that's the fucking story of my life...unsatisfied, unhappy, unfulfilled, pretty much friendless...insecurity in every single one of my relationships...the things i do for people-maybe its wrong to think this way, but i wish they'd do them for me...instead, i often feel ignored, unfortunately, its by one of the people who i consider a best friend...i don't even know what to do you know...i know what her situation is, i know it's not easy and i guess i'm just going to let it be, i can't push and i won't-that's what ruined things before...i just feel lonely and unneeded, better yet, unnecessary. i've been having an anxiety attack since last thursday..i believe that's 4 days...i have a severe inferiority complex and am so competitive about it, it's sick...my only friends who live near me here are moving back to florida which leaves me alone again..i've almost been here for a whole year and i have made pretty much zero progress-i wouldn't be surprised if this actually counted as backwards instead of progress at all...the thing is, i don't know what to do. i regularly get sick..or make myself sick, and i am so scared of reverting back to where I've worked so hard to get out of...what sucks is that i am not sure who cares, who understands and who really wants to...i want to jump out of a window and fly away from "here" and again, i highly doubt anyone would notice, care or wonder, but whatever..i'm about to start to make big changes again..or things that will make big changes-in the way i look, carry myself, all of that. it's time that i learn to feel good about myself because this is getting old, i'm sick of this song and dance